So...here I am, circa 1984,1983, maybe 8th grade, probably 9th grade...no, I think 8th grade...when all I wanted was a pair of argyle socks for Christmas. I don't know if it was due to the fashions of the time (velveteen knickers, button up polo shirts with ribbon bows at the neck----a strange manifestation of glam rock gone bad ten years later?---who can say?) ....Mayhaps it was due to my love of British everything (and they always talked about argyle socks at some point in a Lord Peter Whimsy detective novel by Dorothy L. Sayers, my fave in those days)....anyway, this is an iconic moment in my dorkhood. Now, let's talk about how that dorkness shows itself even today....Or, rather, yesterday. Yesterday, I went to my current favorite photo developing shop, Wolf Camera near Central Market on Lamar.....it is my favorite because they develop photos from ancient slides and negatives and don't give me guff. They don't roll their eyes and act all superior. Thank God, as that was my experience at a certain location in Dallas.....but anyhoo, let's stay on the positive side here...So, I popped into Wolf Camera to see if my photos had arrived from wherever they go to be developed. And there was Cute Blue-Eyed Man-Boy. He works at the counter. He takes the orders, answers the questions, does not roll his eyes. Plus, he is super cute. I try not to notice his cuteness. In fact, I am really self-absorbed upon the receipt of my photos because I have never actually seen these pictures before, they are treasures culled from mysterious and strangely sized negatives. I make him look at the cute photo of my mother when she is 20 years old and in a bathing suit, holding my older sister (as baby) on her lap.....I make excited chit-chat. I drop off my "disposable" camera and agree to return in two hours to pick photos up; they should be of the State Fair and Halloween, so I am jolly in my anticipation and trot on home to clean house and do nothing much.....
I return to Wolf Camera in three hours. I am in route to Katie and Jason's Free Lunch Party, where we all get to eat free at Chipotle thanks to Jason randomly dropping his business card into a fishbowl.....I think, "Get photos, run to lunch/dinner, wheee!" But when I run into the camera shop this time, and see Super Cute Blue-Eyed Man-Boy, it seems busy. Some girl looks at me all crazy when I want to get my photos and then she DOES roll her eyes when Cute Man-Boy brings them over to me. I lack the carefree attitude of the morning. Cutie Blue Eyes, however, is charming as ever. He asks what I have done in my three hours, and I blather something about organizing costumes. He, with good conversational skills, prompts me to explain. I say something about how my photos should document some of these costumes, and I quickly show him some of the pics....but my heart is racing a bit too much, from flirtation or social anxiety disorder, I can't say which.....I mumble something about being in a band called the Sexy Finger Champs, and of course he has not heard of us but notes our suggestive title. I mumble that our last show was two weeks ago. I try to shove my photos back into the envelope. I stutter that we have songs about Jean-Luc Picard and Nipples. Yes, I used those two titles as my examples. Am I retarded? Yes, to some degree, I need social skills training. Because, instead of just being friendly and telling him something like,"Oh, but even tho' I am no longer in a band, come see me as a dancing reindeer in the YellowTape Theater Co. production of "The Ultimate Christmas Musical The Musical!" or the comedy stuff at Coldtowne Theater or my reading my teen angst journals at Coldtowne in November (Nov 16th at 8pm, to be exact)....instead, I said, after he expressed interest in the Jean-Luc Picard song, "Well, you have good taste if you like Jean-Luc Picard....urgh, see ya!" and trotted out of there.
Ugh. It cannot be good to get that nervous from casual chatting. I will try, in future, to do some Zen breathing or something. Because I do have a box full of slides that still need to be developed before Christmas...and I hope that the Cute Blue-Eyed Man-Boy will still be there.
